


love, i suppose

by MxBBadperson



Category: Life Is Strange 2 (Video Game)
Genre: M/M, Mutual Pining, Poetry, Protectiveness, daniel is so smitten with sean oh my god, diazcest, there's a mention of every ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-26
Updated: 2020-01-27
Packaged: 2021-02-27 04:01:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 2,372
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22420717
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MxBBadperson/pseuds/MxBBadperson
Summary: 1 & 2. a river flowing into the sea || a compass needle pointing north3.Tell me you understand what I mean.4. I am clay for you5. & 6. It's jaw is clamped around my ankle, keeping me in place || It's jaws are on the cloth around your ankle, trying to hold on
Relationships: Daniel Diaz/Sean Diaz
Comments: 2
Kudos: 19





	1. from my heart, i love you: a side

You, oh you, you, you, god _you_  
You are something else, something I can never explain,  
I am something else and even then you are something beyond something like me  
You are something important, you are something I want beyond nothing else

Hold me, hold me closer, your arm around my shoulders, your hand on the back of my head  
Hold me, your arm around my neck, your mouth a knife, your tone it cuts

Hold me, you are young, younger than I can ever think, younger than I can dream and I sleep in your arms, unknowing of the world and unknowing of you  
Hold me closer, closer and closer and closer so close we are sewed together with the strongest thread the scissors will snap against it

And it will and oh, it will separate us. The world, my heart, your heart. Anything I can think of and they will separate us.  
Time and distance and misplaced faith and four walls and death and my stupid choice  
Do they matter? They do  
Can they stop us? They can't

From my heart I make a wraith that haunts me and I welcome it with a smile  
From my heart the waiting that festers the wanting and wishing until they overflow, my tears a river  
From my heart the power expanding and expanding and expanding until I can bring the world to its knees 

From my heart, I love you  
From my heart, I will wait for you, time and distance like grains of sand  
From my heart, I will wait for you till death takes me  
From my heart, I will bend bring the world to its knees with only your smile and soft voice 

It is only fair after all that I do these things for you  
You who is beyond something like me  
You with harsh mouth and soft hands  
It is only fair after all that I feel this for you  
You who walked miles to see me, to talk to me

You who have made yourself into unbreakable steel to shelter me  
You who had unraveled your own heart to fix mine  
Bid me and I will come  
Time and distance and the faraway shore and my stupid head, they don't matter.  
Bid me and I will come  
For your hand on my shoulder, your hand on my head, your smiling eyes

For you and your love, a sword made of unbreakable steel and blood  
Bid me and I will come  
For you are the lighthouse and I am lost at sea, the waves over my head  
Bid me and I will come  
A river flowing into the sea, the tides pulled by the moon, like a flower facing the sun  
But you are not the sun because the sun, oh the sun, it is ashamed to see something as bright as you  
Bid me and I will come  
For you are something important, you are something I want beyond nothing else  
Bid me and I will come  
For from my heart, I love you


	2. from my heart, i love you: b side

You. You are something else. Something unknowable yet something knowable.  
Lift this stone, it is weightless to you  
Your questions, your creeping, your eyebrows furrowed, your voice annoyed  
Lift this stone, your grief weighs it down

Come closer, you are small and you smiled at me in wonder and I'm afraid of dropping you  
Come closer, my arm around your neck, my voice sharp  
Come closer, maybe my arms can ease your pain  
I know this isn't enough but my closeness is the only thing I can give

I know this isn't enough but my closeness is the only thing I can give  
A rusty needle and from my heart a thread.   
With them I will stitch your wound close, wishing that it will do

I know this isn't enough but maybe my closeness can give you respite from the world  
And the world, oh the world, it's fair and cruel both, heads or tails, we live on the edge of the coin  
It will separate us. No matter what I do, it will separate us.

Anything I can think of and they will separate us.  
Time and distance and misplaced faith and four walls and death and my stupid choice  
Do they matter? They do  
Can they stop us? Sometimes they can

I shall become a ghost who haunts you, the place where my heart is is forever empty and forever aching  
I shall wait here, in a place you cannot reach, in a place I cannot escape, my heart is sand, ground by the donkey-mill of years and regret

I shall be with you in our house by the ocean, staring out into the sunset. I like that thought the most.  
From my heart, I love you  
From my heart, I will wait for the day I'll be away from these walls  
From my heart, I will wait for you on that faraway shore

From my heart, I will wait for you, grease on my arms  
It is only fair after all that I do these things for you  
You who smiled at me in wonder  
I will unravel my heart to make a blanket to keep you warm  
I will unravel my heart to make chain mail to protect yourself

You don't have to call me, I will come regardless  
You who was given to me to protect  
You don't have to call me, I will come regardless  
I'm afraid of dropping you, I will never let you fall

You don't have to call me, I will come regardless  
For you, something unknowable yet something knowable  
You don't have to call me, I will come regardless  
For from my heart, I love you


	3. beep

I can stop and scream, I want to stop and scream  
in this crowded nightclub, in the confines of my room, the void that is my head   
Who answers me doesn't matter, someone I don't know; someone I do know, their faces old and worried; my grief  
The only one who I want to answer is you

The only answer I want is from you  
Your voice through the telephone receiver, your voice through the looping letters, your voice through my memories  
I want to stop. _I love you._  
I want to scream. _Tell me you understand. Tell me you understand what I mean._

I want to scream. _I love you._   
I want to scream. _I'll wait. For how long as it takes, I'll wait. I'll wait for you._  
I want to scream. _Please tell me you can hear me. Please tell me you understand._

Please answer me. Through the telephone receiver, through the looping letters, through my memories  
Please answer me. I'll wait for it as long as it takes, please answer me.


	4. figurine

You're hands, oh, you're hands, you're workman's hands  
What could love me so? What could shape me so?  
I am what you have made of me  
I am what I am what I am  
I am clay for you  
You have sculpted me into a beast, it's long fangs bared and I am and I am, oh, I am

I am wicked and powerful and nothing can stop me   
Nothing can withstand my fangs, nothing can withstand the snap of my jaw  
I am what you have made of me and aren't I beautiful?  
Beautiful art from a beautiful artist  
I didn't shape you and for that, I am forever jealous

You sculpted yourself. After all, who could shape you so?  
You sculpted yourself into a beast, it's elegant back curved, loping  
You sculpted yourself from the scraps you found. That's the truth  
You have sculpted your heart for me, I am forever relieved

Here, another truth: I have sculpted my heart for you  
Took it into my hands and shaped it until it was a beast that hungered for you  
It's mouth is open, it's dark eyes pleading  
I am wicked and powerful and nothing can stop me   
Nothing but the thought of your lips

You are gracious and powerful and I bare my neck to you  
The mere of thought of it makes me weep  
I am wicked and powerful and I lay at your feet waiting  
You who made me, have mercy, have mercy, doesn't your creation please?  
I am wicked and powerful and nothing can stop me

Nothing but you  
Nothing but your hands, nothing but your lips  
Lay them on me and see the beast you have made of me


	5. stillness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> broke out the formatting in this one!

You come closer, wrapping your arms around me and I go  
_still_  
Prey's heart beats in my chest  
A rabbit thumping against the grass  
I'm not scared of you, I'm scared of myself  
I watch you and there is something behind my eyes that watch you  
_I'm scared of myself_

Myself who has this ugly heart  
My heart is a predator and it hungers  
I am helpless against its whims, helpless against its wants  
Its jaw is clamped around my ankle, keeping me in place  
My body is a cage  
Its bars are rusty, the lock stuck

My heart makes me pace like I am pressing against the bars  
The sprawling field is in your eyes it cries  
Your lips are sweet like berries it cries  
I can't drown it out  
The animal is caught in barbed wire and it's happy to stay there

It wants what it wants  
And it wants  
**You**

I want you, god, I want you  
despite it all, you are good, pure  
And I can't give you any of my ugliness,  
I can't give you my heart that has calcified,  
I can't give you my heart that is half-way to dust

You deserve a better one  
A heart that is _soft_  
and _yielding_  
and _whole_

A heart unstained, a heart unscarred  
A heart that doesn't ache  
A heart that isn't so heavy with longing,  
it weighs on the lungs  
and  
sinks  
to  
the  
bottom  
of  
the  
sink

It hurts me to not reach out but it hurts me to reach out  
The ache is exquisite.  
The ache is a leash and steak both  
You deserve a heart that isn't a starving animal

You deserve someone who doesn't paces like they're looking for the exit and the only exit is your eyes  
You deserve someone who is prey or predator but not a monstrous hybrid of both  
You deserve someone who's heart lets them breathe, 

lets them float

You deserve someone who's isn't scared of themselves  
You deserve someone who isn't scared to touch you  
You deserve someone who isn't scared to want you

I want you, god, I want you  
_I'm scared of myself_  
It hurts me to not reach out but it hurts me to reach out

When will this starving animal let me go?  
When will it unclamp it's jaws around me leg so I can limp free?  
When will it die, stuck inside this clump of barbed wire?  
When can I be blind to the sprawling fields in your eyes?

When can I forget the thought of your lips like berries?  
When will the prey's heart still  
A rabbit still in 

sleep 


	6. furious

I come closer and you go  
still  
_I don't know why_  
I think of no harm against you, no sharp words, no heavy hands  
You move slowly, a shadow of a limp  
You're eyes are seeking, you're mouth soft and tongue tied

Who has hurt you? I shall hunt them down.  
With my sharp teeth, my yearning mouth, my hollow stomach

You look at me as if you are hungry and oh, I want to feed you  
You look at me as I have left you and oh, I want to hold you  
gather you up in my arms and carry you home

I come closer and you go still  
_I want to go still too_  
In your eyes a cave, from your lips the echoes of my name  
Let me press against your heart and let me sleep  
Your breathing a lullaby singing me to sleep

But I can't go be still, I can never be still  
I flit around you, a horse's hooves as my heart, a hummingbird's wings as my hands  
You smile and I snap my jaws, furious for the taste  
I watch you with the eyes of a starving animal  
My throat is dry, my stomach is empty, tied into knots

It scares me to think myself that, it scares me to think of you that way  
Me the predator, you the prey  
But I don't know how to else to explain us

I chase after you, fox's feet running across the grass  
My body isn't a cage for I have set it free  
I follow you, hoping to be fed  
And oh, how you feed me  
You smile and I drink it down, my throat was dry from the lack of it  
You smile and I feast, my stomach it was hollow, light from the lack of it  
I see you and my belly is almost full

I wish to be full, I wish to not be full  
I wish to drink from you, eat from you  
I wish to hold you  
I wish to gather you up in my arms and carry you home  
Let's go to the sprawling fields where the berries are sweet  
Somewhere where you won't be afraid  
Somewhere where you won't be afraid of me

All I have are my soft hands, my searching eyes, my yearning mouth, my quiet words  
The starving animal in my chest, shuffling after your shadow, ears pricked for the mere echo of your voice  
Its jaws are on the cloth around your ankle, trying to hold on  
Give me your heart it cries  
Give me your heart it cries  
Give me your heart it cries  
_And I cry with it_

I know your heart is old and tarnished and I want it  
I know your heart is heavy and half-gone and I want it  
I will hold it in my hands gently  
The starving animal will hold it in its jaws  
It has filed its teeth to stubs for this moment  
It will lie down in the cave in your eyes  
Its stomach finally full  
A fox still in

sleep


End file.
